California!

HI THERE. HOW THE @&%$ ARE YA?!
SO AFTER CHECKING OUT SOME %&$#@ EXCELLENT BOURBON I HEADED OFF TO THE EAST COAST.
I HEADED STRAIGHT FOR &%@$# LAS VEGAS AND $&$%#@ CHECKED INTO THE GRAND MGM HOTEL...WHAT A &%$#@ DUMP! THE PLACE IS FULL OF BORING RICH %$&#@* %&$#@ &%$#@* WITH NOTHING BETTER TO DO THAN THAN SPEND A WHOLE DAY ON A @%&$# SLOT MACHINE.
ACTUALLY YOU ARE PROBABLY @%&$# WONDERING HOW I CAN AFFORD TO CHECK IN TO SUCH A $%&#!* EXPENSIVE HOTEL..I'LL EXPLAIN THAT SOME OTHER TIME YA $%&#@!* NOSEY &%$#"@% !!
ANYWAY, I DECIDED TO HAVE SOME FUN AND *@%&$# HASSLE AS MANY RICH $$%&# AS I COULD BEFORE BEING KICKED OUT.
I WENT UP TO ONE %&$#@ *$$%&#$ AND SAID 'I LOST $10 000 000 ON THE SHARE MARKET TODAY, COULD YOU SPARE A MILLION'? WHEN THE @%&$# SAID NO, I GAVE HIM A VULCAN NERVE PINCH AND CHINESE WRIST BURN!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I THEN RAN AROUND THE FLOOR YELLING 'BUSH IS A @%&$##* COMMUNIST' AND WAS VERY QUICKLY BOOTED OUT! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
I REPEATED THIS IN ALL OF THE @&%$# MAJOR HOTELS IN $%&#@ LAS VEGAS AND AM NOW BANNED FROM ALL OF THEM!! HAHAHAHAHAH!
&%$#@ EXCELLENT!!
I WAS REALLY HOPING TOM JONES WAS *$%&#! PLAYING WHILE I WAS THERE BUT HE WASN'T *@&$ IT!!
SO AFTER THAT @%$&# OF A CITY I HEADED OFF TO LOS ANGELES.
I'LL TELL YOU ABOUT THAT LATER YA WUSSIES!
DRINK UP!